Butterflies

Suggest A Butterfly

There’s got to be a bit of give and take here.

We’ve done a lot of good in this here section, giving blood to the bloodless, giving organs to the organ-needing, buying Fairtrade to not ruin lives, learning first aid to help save some, voting because it’s what Vera Lynn fought and died for, volunteering because it looks good on the CV, banking ethically because someone has to, using gift aid because it’d be silly not to, using social networks for good instead of for nothing, meddling for the sake of it, getting a charity credit card even though they’re a bit shit, giving our glasses to the four-eyed and our books to the bookish, giving to charity instead of not, using libraries instead of book shops, using public transport like we’re on the dole, using renewable energy like we’re in the future, using a personal ashtray whether we smoke or not, using menstrual cups whether we have periods or not, burying ourselves in cardboard coffins whether we’re dead or not, cutting down on paper to save cutting down trees, ditching bottled water because it’s stupid on a scale of such vastness it’s visible from space, and so on and such and such.

But when I say we’ve done a lot of good in this here section I’m using the royal we. You haven’t done nuthin’. Gang, I can’t keep doing this by myself. Suggest a Butterfly. Tell Team Zero how you reduce your carbon footprint (Steve from Chebb suggests using less carbon), what to do with our old yogurt pots (Jan from Leeming turns them into a delicious chutney) or how to convert others to our way of thinking (Jim from Bristol suggests some form of violence-based brainwashing system). You’ve got ideas and experience and passion and enthusiasm I can nick so billions of regular readers can go forth and butter your flies.

You can email your Butterflies to my team of ghostwriters, DM me on Twitter, message me on my OnlyFans if I hit hard times, or post in the comments which may or may not be open according to how many offers of knock-off handbags and cock pills we’re flooded with. And tell other people what you’re up to. Drop a Butterfly in a Facebook status update, tweet one in a Twitter tweet, farn one at Syllable Message. Tell your sister. Have her pass it on to her dentist. Tell me. I’ll add some swears and plonk it up here.

We have ideas. They should be shared. Let the Butter fly!

Suggest A Butterfly

 
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Other people will do it

 

Your idea could save the world!

 

Photo credit: The Zero

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