Long-time followers of the site (me) will recall my environmental efforts in my last place of work, from complaining about our need for recycle bins to nagging about the absence of bins for recycling. It was a wide and varied campaign that addressed literally ones of issues. When take up was slow I brought out the big guns: the violent mood swings of Mr Albert Gore. He saw to it that people were educated about the folly of disposable cups, the madness of binning recyclable stuff, the moronitude of single-sided printing and the deeply erotic joys of his scribble pads. Following my lame-ass attempts to lead by example in my placement, the mighty Gore has returned to bring hope to the hopeless and annoyance to the easily annoyed.
Bish: I’m putting Happy Al next to the light switches in the toilets to encourage people to turn off the lights when they’re done. Its estimated this will make what experts are calling “a fraction of a tiny percent of a micro-difference” to global warming.
Bash: I’m putting Angry Al in the two kitchens, next to the bins that are forever full of plastic bottles, aluminium cans and dodo feathers.
Bosh: I’m putting frustrated Al on the printer. He can’t take any more of this single-sided printing shit.
And with that we begin again the barely amused reactions, the unconvincing, slightly embarrassed denials from me, and the absolutely no change to anyone’s environmental habits.