Category: Global inequality

So there I was, all ready to announce Kiva as the Chazza of the Month for a second non-consecutive time when what should appear but a classic spot of Zero angst? You’ll recall how Kiva is a microfinance outfit offering loans to people in developing countries and how I’ve bigged them up a couple of times already. But after that last rant about payday lenders being arseholes the worries I’ve had about microfinance went from being vague floaty things at the back of my mind to being slightly less vague, marginally firmer things on a list of other things to consider thinking about at some point in time when I can be bothered.

If I was pressed on the point I suppose I’d have to concede that in my time as the world’s leading source of inspiration I’ve picked up as many enemies as I have fans, and that their levels of adoration and fury are about even. Like Bono I’m a polarising figure, although my ratio of haters to fans is a marked improvement on his; mine being 1:1 and his being the entire population of the earth:Bono.

As a major celebrity on the world stage I carry with me the heavy burden of a certain knowledge; the knowledge that death will come for me soon. We fade quickly, those of us who burn most brightly. Death will come soon and in one of only three ways: a tragic car crash that cuts me down in my prime, a tragic accidental overdose that incriminates a lowlife pharmacist, or a tragic strangle-wank in the wardrobe of a five star hotel.

Payday has passed which means it’s time for a new charity of the month or, as the kids are calling it, a new Chazza of the Month. Or as I’m calling it, a new Chazza of the Mozza. (Chazza ozza the Mozza would be taking it too far.) This month sees a formula breaker as we give not to a charity but to a non-profit microfinance organisation, Kiva. That’ll keep us on our toes.